The victim is constantly on edge, wondering how her partner is going to respond to their every move. This behavior damages the victim’s self esteem, self-confidence, emotional and psychological well-being. The abuser likes something she does today, but dislikes it tomorrow, or reacts to the extreme at an identical behavior by her at another time. The following are some of their characteristic behaviors and tactics, to confuse and control their victims, which give an insight into their minds. Living with an abuser is a no win situation for the victim. Often they threaten children, family members or friends with harm if the victim doesn’t comply with his demands. This imagined rejection is then used to justify emotional, psychological and physical abuse.Ībusers use threats to cultivate fear, anxiety and despair in their victim. When this doesn’t happen, the abuser feels insecure, unloved and rejected. Partners of abusers are essentially expected to be mind readers and know in advance the needs of the abusive spouse. The abuser’s idea of sex is confused with this idea of power and control, and not with love and tenderness. They feel vulnerable when they are open and truthful with others. A relationship with them will turn into a toxic relationship.Ībusers are seldom capable of a relationship that includes real intimacy. These methods that abusers, both male and female, use to manipulate their victims are a natural part of their personalities.Īll abusers are dysfunctional individuals, insecure and unable to have a relationship unless they are in complete control. These methods, of manipulating their victims’ minds and destroying their sense of identity, are their tools to control their partner. They seem to intuitively use methods of psychological and mind control that take years of training for normal people to master. This is used to keep the victim under control.Ībusers use weird and warped logic to control. The victim knows better, but over time will begin to question her sanity.īe alert to these tactics, which can break a person down until she thinks she is going insane. Notwithstanding this, women can also be abusers, and in monosex relationships obviously both are the same gender.ĭo you feel you cannot understand the logic of your partner and feel that you are going crazy (as in losing your sanity) in your own home? The abuser will swear that events never occurred and that certain things were never said. This is used here as a convenience as most physical abusers are male and their victims are female. Gender Disclaimer: The pronouns “he” and “him” are used for the abuser and “she” and “her” for the victim. This article describes how their dysfunctional minds work.

These methods that abusers, both male and female, use to manipulate their victims are a natural part of their personalities. Abusers share a limited range of behaviors and thinking patterns.

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